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Lines in the Sand

 This would be so beneficial if it could be an actual conversation, that's just wishful thinking though! You can't make someone hear your heart when they aren't capable of even seeing you for you.  

When you reach out on text but your tone, intent and words are manipulated/twisted to fit someone else's narrative, then you know it's pointless.  When you very clearly state why you did something OR didn't do something and even that is turned into you being sly or rude about the way you deliver a feeling, there's no getting through.  You care about this person, clearly, or it wouldn't hurt so much.  

But consider this...you're so worried about someone who isn't worried about you. 

 When someone shows you who they are, pay attention...If they will talk bad about others to you, you better believe they will talk bad about you to others.  It's a hard lesson to learn, and generally takes getting caught in the crosshairs to really figure it out.  It's messy!!! 

How do you set a healthy boundary that says "No Drama"?!? 

A good rule to follow,  don't saying something about someone that you wouldn't say to their face.  Keep yourself accountable, be the example. If a friend regularly comes to you and wants to discuss everyone else's life choices in a negative light...be the positive light!!! Shine a light on the positives in the situation and move on to another topic.  Don't get caught up in it!!  The hope is that your friend will catch on and realize that you're not going to play along, you're not going to get stuck in their negativity trap.  Maybe, just maybe,  your positive vibes will rub off on them and be the change they need! 

"As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another."~Proverbs 27:17

Unfortunately, there's always the downside, it may not go well at all.  A lot of times setting healthy boundaries is met with discord and more uncomfortable situations. But remember, life is not about perfection, it's about progression. If you're trying to better yourself and move on to a healthier you, then don't stand down because the path gets rough.  You will have those who will remind you of your past mistakes in order to keep you right where you are. Past mistakes are your stepping stones to a better you, keep them under your feet where they belong...don't carry them around.  Past mistakes don't define you, they guide you!  

Sadly, sometimes you have to walk away! You can't give everyone access to your life, you just can't! Just because they're in your life doesn't mean they want the best for your life.  What good does it do to be rowing your boat (life)  but having someone in it with you who is drilling holes behind your back?!?

Those that are meant to be in your life won't degrade you,  judge you, or talk about you, because they're too busy loving you and uplifting you.  If you put your faith in fickle opinions you'll never be good enough.  Focus on God's truth and purpose for your life and you'll find your perfect self. 

~Trent Shelton 

 

Going into 2021, weed your garden, lighten your load....put space between you and things that don't bring you peace.  Self care isn't selfish! Be committed to you, your growth, your peace!

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